How Do I Love Well, No Matter What?
Dawn Spicer, Friendship, Relationship, Control, Love Dawn Spicer Dawn Spicer, Friendship, Relationship, Control, Love Dawn Spicer

How Do I Love Well, No Matter What?

A few weeks ago, a friend and I had a slight miscommunication that went awry. Something she said, I interpreted very differently than what was her intent and in the moment, I snapped back at her and retreated to my own pity party. My mind and my heart knew that she would never say something to try and hurt me but I let emotions take over and I chose to allow them to rule the situation.

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Have You Forgotten My Request, God?

Have You Forgotten My Request, God?

The other day I found myself wanting an explanation from God. I know this sounds ridiculous but let me explain.

Some of my prayer requests are several years old. Healing, salvation, relationship restoration, and other long-term desires take time. I understand God knows far better than I do the perfect outcome and the best time to respond. But I also know that His flawless will may fail to match the way that makes so much sense to me. In fact, His answer might be, “no”, and I may have refused to recognize or accept that.

When the pain of unanswered prayer enters my day, I find myself asking God,” Why are you silent and still when I know You could be powerful and present?” Do you wonder the same thing sometimes?

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Boundaries, Toxic Relationships, and Forgiveness- How Should Christians Respond?

Boundaries, Toxic Relationships, and Forgiveness- How Should Christians Respond?

We have all dealt with a difficult person at one point or another, but what are Christians to do with abusive and toxic relationships? What do we do with people who continually hurt or misuse us? How should we handle someone who tries to pull us into unbiblical behavior or keep us from becoming the person God desires us to be?

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What’s the Worst That Can Happen?
Alyssa Adkins, Control, Acceptance, Anxiety, Trust Alyssa Adkins Alyssa Adkins, Control, Acceptance, Anxiety, Trust Alyssa Adkins

What’s the Worst That Can Happen?

Before I got sober, I tried to control everything. That control, born from the fear of failing at parenting, marriage, balancing home and work, hosting, Christian-ing, etc. kept me captive in a constant state of anxiety about kids’ schedules, home responsibilities, work commitments, personal and professional relationships, body image, and social standing. I worried what people thought, I obsessed about how things “looked,” and I compared myself to everyone else while I attempted to calculate, regulate and even manipulate my circumstances to achieve perfection. It. Was. Exhausting. So, I drank to cope with the pressure.

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What If Loving God Is As Simple As a Three Dollar Donation And a Poorly Crafted Letter?
Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle

What If Loving God Is As Simple As a Three Dollar Donation And a Poorly Crafted Letter?

Lesson #4 on a Journey to a Water Well...

One day in April 2014, when my husband had finished reading "Kisses from Katie" to our children, my five-year-old son, Ben, marched into the kitchen with his wallet. Methodically, he withdrew three one-dollar bills and laid them on the counter. He looked at me and said, "Momma, write this down and send it to Katie. 'Dear Katie, ...

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What’s With Obedience?
Dawn Spicer, Obedience Dawn Spicer Dawn Spicer, Obedience Dawn Spicer

What’s With Obedience?

Several years ago I accidentally put a knife through my hand while cutting an avocado. It immediately began bleeding profusely and my husband quickly wanted to call 911. I told him not to because I was convinced it would eventually stop bleeding and I would be ok. Thankfully, he didn’t listen to me and called anyway. I stood over the sink with my hand clenched, not letting anyone examine it.

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Can you let go of white-knuckled living?

Can you let go of white-knuckled living?

I have a confession. I love everything about being a mom…except sitting in the passenger seat when our kids are learning how to drive.

They saw independence, freedom, and an exciting future. I saw the potential for an accident with possibly life-altering consequences. While our new drivers enthusiastically tackled busier roads and more complicated intersections, I hid my nerves to avoid undermining their confidence. Quite often, I found myself clenching my hands together so tightly that my knuckles turned white, and I had to take a deep breath because I realized that unconsciously, I was barely breathing.

Of course, I prayed for safety before these nerve-wracking road sessions, but we live in a fallen world and my petitions for protection sometimes felt more like frantic pleas. What if God allowed an accident despite my prayers?

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How will I respond to God's forgiveness?

How will I respond to God's forgiveness?

I attend a large church in O'fallon, Illinois, that frequently hosts big conferences and events. Recently, our church housed a Matthew West concert in our worship center. My family and I met some friends there that night, and to ensure that our large group of 12 could all sit together, we decided to scope out the upper side loft of the church.

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Preserving Power Mode
Meditation, Self-Care Alyssa Adkins Meditation, Self-Care Alyssa Adkins

Preserving Power Mode

Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt guilty taking a nap...or asking to be alone in your room...or secretly driving around the block one...or even five times while enjoying your silent solitude in the car. Why? Why do we feel so bad?

Why do we long for a day at the spa? What’s the purpose of controlled breathing in child labor? Why are 911 operators even toned and patient, repeatedly asking callers to calm down? What do we tell our children when the site of blood from a scraped knee induces tears of hysteria? When our mind is focused and our body is calm, we’re better equipped to function. We can think more clearly, react more safely and work more efficiently. God created us to slow down in order to speed up.

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Why Can’t Things Go Back To The Way They Were?
Dawn Spicer, Redemption, Restoration Dawn Spicer Dawn Spicer, Redemption, Restoration Dawn Spicer

Why Can’t Things Go Back To The Way They Were?

For a few years after my affair was exposed, I spent many a day just begging the Lord to make everything go back to normal. I was yearning so badly for normal. I longed for people to trust me again, for friends to want to be around me again and I ached for people to look at me like they used to, treat me like they used to. There was desperation for everyone to know that I was changed, that I was transformed, that I was different. It was there that I found myself falling into another trap of the enemy consumed with what people thought about me more than I was consumed with what Jesus was doing in me. I was trying my best to do everything right, clinging to friendships as if I was terrified to lose them because I’d already lost so many. I was working hard going into overdrive trying to prove myself to be good and it was exhausting.

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Is God Trustworthy?

Is God Trustworthy?

The thorns get our attention because we feel their pain. Loneliness, isolation, stress, anxiety, and desperately desired but unanswered prayers poke us every minute of every day, reminding us there must be something better than this!

We must surrender our own way to fix things and remind ourselves that God’s will is better than what we think is the best way.

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How can I be sure that I’ll make it to Heaven?

How can I be sure that I’ll make it to Heaven?

God's grace is so mysterious because we often feel like we don't deserve it, and we're exactly right. We don't. But He gave it freely anyway. Grace is absolutely scandalous! How could a seasoned criminal skeet by with a free pass? How could the adulterous woman be given a second shot? How could God look upon me as I was drowning in a sea of drugs, alcohol, and promiscuity and decide that I was worthy of His love?

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Eating Comfort Food at Wine o'Clock after Retail Therapy

Eating Comfort Food at Wine o'Clock after Retail Therapy

No wonder we’re quick to rosé all day, and shop ‘till we drop from a food coma. A glass of wine to take the edge off. A pint of ice cream to comfort a broken heart. A click on “submit purchase” to suppress the envy. We’ve all done it. It’s a natural human reaction to want to comfort uncomfortable feelings. Doing something to distract us from our problems, to numb negative feelings, is almost instinctual. Drinking, eating junk or going on a shopping spree feels good when we’re feeling bad ... in the moment. But responding to life's stressors with cabernet, candy, and click-throughs is not a wise long-term plan. Drowning our sorrows in frosty mugs or waffle cones is not self-care. Coronas, cupcakes, and Coach bags don’t help us cope! They only help us conceal. Self-care that promotes concealing over coping is self-medicating. And self-medicating is the first step down a slippery slope towards self-destruction.

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Will God Use a Half-Hearted Yes?
Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle

Will God Use a Half-Hearted Yes?

God wants to move us from unfulfillment to fulfillment. But sometimes, we don’t realize we’re living in unfulfillment. And the path God’s suggesting doesn’t seem like the road to satisfaction. Truthfully, it’s hard to grasp the magnitude of God’s Faithfulness if we never step out of the safety and security of our well-orchestrated lives.

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Do I Really Have To Talk To Her?

Do I Really Have To Talk To Her?

As a Women’s Ministry Director, it seems the thing I am hearing more and more is that women feel disconnected, alone, and unseen. After the last two years, I am not surprised. Women are drowning in despair. Each time this is shared with me, the ache in my heart intensifies. I have been in that space, so my understanding and compassion for those that share this is vast. In hearing this repeatedly, I have been asking the Lord to open my eyes to those that feel unseen, those that are desperate for connection, those that are afraid to share their struggles, for fear of judgment or rejection.

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Does God Know What He’s Doing?

Does God Know What He’s Doing?

Have you ever experienced a moment that turned your life upside down and left you feeling disoriented and distraught? Maybe that describes your current reality and you’re wondering if the future will ever feel promising again. Whether we try harder or deny its existence or numb it or push through it, emotional pain isn’t healthy to ignore. It must be addressed, or it will start to control our actions.

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Can I Surrender to God's Plan When God's Plan Is Not My Own?

Can I Surrender to God's Plan When God's Plan Is Not My Own?

These battles have shattered my heart repeatedly, but each time, God has been there to put the broken pieces back together more beautifully than they were ever arranged before. He has used these moments to reveal Himself to me in such intimate ways. Our entire family has learned firsthand that tremendous pain can build tremendous faith- and to us, that's been worth every moment of the fight.

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To-Dos, How-Tos and What-Ifs

To-Dos, How-Tos and What-Ifs

Raise your hand if you’ve ever thought, while discussing where to eat with your husband, boyfriend or group of friends, “I don’t really care, I can’t make one more decision today. Someone else decide and just tell me where to go...”

Can you relate? We’re faced with so many decisions inside of one day. Choosing what to wear each morning (selecting which leggings and sweatshirt combo is still a choice), or what we’re going to eat is enough, but we often must do it for all the people in our home too! Let’s not even get into schedules. How and when to wash our hair, prepare meals, clean the house and shop for all the things to do all the above can leave us feeling like we’re in the movie, Groundhog Day. When to get everyone to the dentist? Their physicals? Haircuts? What to buy for any given friend, parent, child, friend’s child’s birthday next week...or even tomorrow. It’s A. LOT.

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How Should God’s Love Impact Our Fears and Lead us to Yes?
Dana Wrinkle, Obedience, Trust Dana Wrinkle Dana Wrinkle, Obedience, Trust Dana Wrinkle

How Should God’s Love Impact Our Fears and Lead us to Yes?

Is anyone old enough to remember Tina Turner’s song “What’s Love Got to Do with It?” You might wonder what love has to do with freeing you from free or enabling you to say yes to God. In fact, you’d be wise to spend some time teasing out these spiritual mysteries. Fear has been in ample supply over the past two years, and we’ll hear a lot about love today since it’s Valentine’s Day. The better question is: how should God’s love impact our fears and lead us to yes?

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