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EMOTIONS
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Why Can’t I Surrender?
I was on a conference call when it happened, but I could have easily been on the phone with one of my young adult kids, or in the kitchen when my husband came home, or having lunch with a good friend. Someone made a comment that shattered my peace and filled me with dismay and devastation. The rest of my world stopped while my thoughts started spinning. How can I solve this problem?
Why Am I an Emotional Wreck?
Have you ever considered trusting God with your emotions even though your circumstances are unlikely to change?
I wish I could say that stuck in crippling emotion, I sit cross-legged, with my eyes closed and my palms up, trustingly laying my feelings at the feet of Jesus. Maybe I could even add some scented candles to the scene, creating a peaceful setting that I report smells like lavender. Unfortunately, that’s a work of fiction that exists only in my mind. Instead, my narrative is filled with turmoil, restlessness, and frustration. I become pre-occupied. My mind distractedly focuses on my problem, and my brow goes into a prolonged furrowed state. Lavender is nowhere to be found.
Would You Rather?
As I journeyed through my years of healing, one of the things I had to realize was that I had chosen so many other things for fulfillment over Jesus. My life revealed this in many ways, yet, I didn’t recognize it because I was blinded by comfort and complacency. We often think we are living good and right because we are checking all the good christian boxes, but the reality is how our lives reflect it. Does your life reflect that you choose Jesus above all, that you’d rather Him than any other thing in your life?
Have You Forgotten My Request, God?
The other day I found myself wanting an explanation from God. I know this sounds ridiculous but let me explain.
Some of my prayer requests are several years old. Healing, salvation, relationship restoration, and other long-term desires take time. I understand God knows far better than I do the perfect outcome and the best time to respond. But I also know that His flawless will may fail to match the way that makes so much sense to me. In fact, His answer might be, “no”, and I may have refused to recognize or accept that.
When the pain of unanswered prayer enters my day, I find myself asking God,” Why are you silent and still when I know You could be powerful and present?” Do you wonder the same thing sometimes?
Is God Trustworthy?
The thorns get our attention because we feel their pain. Loneliness, isolation, stress, anxiety, and desperately desired but unanswered prayers poke us every minute of every day, reminding us there must be something better than this!
We must surrender our own way to fix things and remind ourselves that God’s will is better than what we think is the best way.
Do I Really Have To Talk To Her?
As a Women’s Ministry Director, it seems the thing I am hearing more and more is that women feel disconnected, alone, and unseen. After the last two years, I am not surprised. Women are drowning in despair. Each time this is shared with me, the ache in my heart intensifies. I have been in that space, so my understanding and compassion for those that share this is vast. In hearing this repeatedly, I have been asking the Lord to open my eyes to those that feel unseen, those that are desperate for connection, those that are afraid to share their struggles, for fear of judgment or rejection.
To-Dos, How-Tos and What-Ifs
Raise your hand if you’ve ever thought, while discussing where to eat with your husband, boyfriend or group of friends, “I don’t really care, I can’t make one more decision today. Someone else decide and just tell me where to go...”
Can you relate? We’re faced with so many decisions inside of one day. Choosing what to wear each morning (selecting which leggings and sweatshirt combo is still a choice), or what we’re going to eat is enough, but we often must do it for all the people in our home too! Let’s not even get into schedules. How and when to wash our hair, prepare meals, clean the house and shop for all the things to do all the above can leave us feeling like we’re in the movie, Groundhog Day. When to get everyone to the dentist? Their physicals? Haircuts? What to buy for any given friend, parent, child, friend’s child’s birthday next week...or even tomorrow. It’s A. LOT.