Can you let go of white-knuckled living?
“Then my enemies will turn back in the day when I call. This I know, that God is for me.”
Psalm 56:9 (ESV)
I have a confession. I love everything about being a mom…except sitting in the passenger seat when our kids are learning how to drive.
They saw independence, freedom, and an exciting future. I saw the potential for an accident with possibly life-altering consequences. While our new drivers enthusiastically tackled busier roads and more complicated intersections, I hid my nerves to avoid undermining their confidence. Quite often, I found myself clenching my hands together so tightly that my knuckles turned white, and I had to take a deep breath because I realized that unconsciously, I was barely breathing.
Of course, I prayed for safety before these nerve-wracking road sessions, but we live in a fallen world and my petitions for protection sometimes felt more like frantic pleas. What if God allowed an accident despite my prayers?
We all have stories that ended in disappointment where God didn’t provide a clean and happy ending. I know stay-at-home moms whose husbands lost their jobs, families whose children ditched their faith, parents who lost their children, and faithful friends who were diagnosed with cancer. I’m sure my devoted friends prayed for deliverance, but God’s divine wisdom didn’t match their personal desires. I suspect you know your share of people who prayed, and God didn’t provide the solution they requested either. Maybe right now you feel yourself barely breathing, and you stare at your white knuckles wondering if God will provide what you desperately want.
Friends, we aren’t supposed to feel this way when we come to God with our requests. We are supposed to feel relief and contentment!
After years of fighting doubts while chasing peace, I discovered Psalms 55-59. They gave me a new perspective on trusting God during the toughest times of our lives.
Psalms 55-59 were written when David faced constant danger from his enemies and his future was unknown. He felt anxious, upset, and afraid, and he appealed to God for help.
In these Psalms, we learn that God is David’s refuge and his safe place.
A refuge is a place where we are secure and sheltered from pursuit, danger, or trouble. It’s a protected place against the storms that rage in our lives, and an anchor where we can secure our emotions and steady our spirit. In our refuge, we are strengthened for what’s ahead. In our refuge, we exchange our white-knuckled prayers for palm-up petitions. We do this by listening when our Refuge speaks.
God reminds us that He hears our voice, saves us, and sustains us (Psalm 55). He is for us (Psalm 56:9). He fulfills His good purpose for us and sends His steadfast love and faithfulness to us (Psalm 57). He is our fortress (Psalm 59:16).
God wants to save us as much as we want to be saved. Our prayers are safe in His hands because David reminds us in Psalm 56:9 (ESV), “This I know, that God is for me.”
As a holy God, God can only act in a perfect way full of love. If God decides to answer our prayer request by allowing a storm to disrupt our lives, then He will do the following three things:
1. He will help us weather its assault.
2. He will protect us from the storm’s forces.
3. He will use the storm for something beneficial in our lives.
Our prayers don’t need to be pleading prayers of desperation. We can surrender our desires to the One who supports us and is for us.
When God is our refuge, we exchange faith in our plan for faith in His faithfulness.
If you find yourself praying with white knuckles and shallow breaths, retreat to your refuge and be reminded of God’s great love and faithfulness toward you. Then you can ditch desperation and rest in His salvation.
Dear Lord, Forgive me that I’m struggling to trust you. Strengthen me according to your word and help me remember that you are on my side, fighting the battle for me. Help me to remember that you are for me and that your way is better than mine. Thank you for your faithfulness and great love for me. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen
Resources to Help
1. Read Psalm 56. Can you identify with David’s thoughts in verses 1-7? What does David notice about God in verse 8, that allows him to trust God over his reality? How does it make you feel that God sees you, hears you, and is for you?
2. Read Psalm 57. What do verses 2-3 say about you?
3. Write down a prayer request that gives you white knuckles and shallow breaths. Next to that prayer request, write verses from Psalms 56-59 that help you trust those requests to God. Now take a deep breath and tell Him that you trust Him to answer in the best way for you, no matter when or how. Ask for Him to strengthen you to trust Him with that request.