Why Does Surrender Feel So Scary?
Guest Writer, Surrender Susan McAlinden Guest Writer, Surrender Susan McAlinden

Why Does Surrender Feel So Scary?

It was 4 am as I stood trembling in front of the bathroom mirror and whispered “my life is not going to be the same!”. I had just taken a pregnancy test and to my dismay it was showing positive. A flood of worries came crashing into my head as I felt an overwhelm of emotions. How will this affect each of us in the family? Is my body ready for this journey? How will my teenage sons react to the news? How did this even happen?! I spent the next three hours with a million thoughts a minute racing through my mind.

What do you do when situations you thought were very much under your control and caution get overridden?

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Why So Long, Lord?
Susan McAlinden, Authenticity Susan McAlinden Susan McAlinden, Authenticity Susan McAlinden

Why So Long, Lord?

The other day, someone made a comment and it re-opened wounds that I thought had healed. It was completely unintentional on her end, and I was able to stay focused on the conversation with my friend. But her innocent proclamation unleashed a flood of torment in my soul. The anguish I felt came from a reminder that a long-term prayer request of mine has never been answered. It’s just dangling in the wind, waiting for God’s wisdom, and timing to dictate its resting place. Why did God answer her prayer and not mine?

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Where is Your Promise, God?

Where is Your Promise, God?

I’m the queen of both romanticism and nostalgia. This means that my vision of an upcoming change in life doesn’t always match reality. If we decide to move across the country for my husband’s job, I tend to romanticize the change with cautious optimism while greatly minimizing its challenges. Or, if time ushers in a new life stage, such as the beginning of middle age, I go to the other extreme and embrace nostalgia while despairing that the future will never be as enjoyable and meaningful as the past. In either case, my tendency to imagine the future creates expectations that slam into reality and produce disappointment and discontentment once one chapter closes and another one opens. Can you relate to either of these? Whether we are optimistically romantic, or hopelessly nostalgic, our presumptive nature is a tactic to help us manage our expectations and quiet our fears.

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What’s Next?
Alyssa Adkins, Change Alyssa Adkins Alyssa Adkins, Change Alyssa Adkins

What’s Next?

I've heard it said that “the days are long, but the years are short.” I dismissed this cliché phrase during the toddler years, but it’s defining these teenaged years. And I’m struggling. What’s next? They’ll all graduate one right after another, and while I recognize the Enemy is trying to distract me from embracing these milestone moments, I can’t deny that I’m starting to wonder what I’ll do after the house is empty. Who will I be? What will my husband and I do with all our free time?

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