Is God Stingy?
Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4 (ESV)
Have you ever wondered why God doesn’t always provide what feels like a desire of your heart? In last week’s post, I mentioned my conviction that I was meant to be married and have my own family. There is nothing sinful about this desire. In fact, I thought this desire was in line with God’s own plans. God provided companionship in response to the very first human’s desire, and God commanded Adam and Eve to, “go forth and multiply.” Why wouldn’t God respond to me like He did for the first couple and millions of others since?
You might have a similar question about something in your life. What feels so right to you, as if it’s meant to be, but God hasn’t answered your prayers? Is it saving your marriage, or starting a family? Maybe it’s using your creativity to benefit others, or something as beautiful as leading someone special to Christ. Why won’t God satisfy these biblically sound requests?
Our hurting hearts and desperate prayers are not being ignored. If we harbor an unmet biblical longing, it’s because God has a holy reason for prolonging our waiting.
In His provision for us, sometimes God’s silence is a protection. In His kindness toward us, sometimes God’s delay is really a deliverance. In His love for us, sometimes God’s refrainment is for our refinement.
In my case, God looked past my “what” and gazed deeply at my “why”. You see, some dreams feel so right, but our reason for wanting them is wrong. Our motivation matters to God because it reveals the nature of our heart.
When Cain offered the first fruits of His labor to God, something God commanded, God was displeased. We don’t know if Cain brought His offerings grudgingly, or with selfish intent, but we know that something was wrong with the focus of Cain’s soul, and God cares about our intent. (1 Samuel 16:7)
Something was wrong with my heart too.
God’s silence is never meant to make us suffer, but to encourage our surrender. In my case, I hadn’t yet trusted God as the redeemer of my life. This was the final straw among many straws that led me to a point where I submitted my desire to His authority.
God wasn’t withholding good things from me because He was malicious or cruel, but because He knew that deeper than my strongest yearning, my trust in Him would ultimately provide the contentment in my life that I craved. Every other answer to my heart’s desires would only bring temporary and imperfect relief.
If you are feeling like there is more for you, can you trust God with your desires? Whether it’s a protection, a timing issue, a spiritual refinement, or a motivation issue, can you lay it at His feet and trust Him to fill you in the only way He can---perfectly?
It wasn’t until I laid down my desires and trusted them to God that He granted them to me in a prettier package. Since then, I have had more desperately held heart’s desires and He has chosen to leave them unfulfilled. This hurts, but below the pain is a reservoir of peace deep in my soul, and it’s just enough to remind me that His desires are better than my dreams. There is relief for the desperation you feel in your soul. It starts with your surrender. Will you trust Him?
Dear Lord, you know what I want. I’m desperate for _________. I don’t know why you haven’t provided it, but I will trust you with my desire. Help me trust you to provide what I need to fill the empty places in me. Show me the way. Thank you for loving me and caring about my hurting heart. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.
Resources to Help
Song: “Trust in You” by Lauren Daigle
“Do It Again” by Elevation Worship