Have you Ever Hit Rock Bottom?
“These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.”
John 16:33 (ESV)
I remember feeling like my future looked hopeless. If I wanted to slit my wrists, it would be best to do it in the bathtub, to keep things clean and self-contained. It was a fleeting thought, but it materialized more than once. All my tomorrows looked bleak, drab, and unfulfilling. God obviously didn’t want to give me what I felt with every fiber of my being I was created to be, a wife and a mom.
That may sound overly dramatic, but it’s how I felt at that time in my life. Have you ever sensed that you were meant for more? That despite your best efforts, a large part of you remains unfulfilled? Maybe you are stuck in a lackluster career, a dead-end job, a stagnant marriage, or a disappointing family life. Or maybe you have everything you wanted and all that you aspire to accomplish, but something inside of you screams, “Is this all there is?”
Since God wasn’t providing what I felt was my greatest calling, I wondered if He had a purpose for my life. Do you ever wonder that too?
Psalm 57:2 says, “I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me.” (ESV)
This verse tells us that God has a purpose for each one of us. Why was I struggling to find this purpose? Why are you?
Maybe it’s because God’s purpose for us is more profound than what we imagine for ourselves.
Whatever you think would fill your deepest desire is never going to penetrate as fully and saturate as richly as the purpose for which God created you.
Our greatest purpose is to know God and glorify Him forever.
John 15:11 says, “These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.” (ESV)
For us to feel full, full of joy, contentment, peace, and purpose, we must know and walk with God. God loves us too much to allow us to settle for temporary happiness. He wants us to have everlasting joy. The empty place in my life, and your life, can only be filled by Him.
While our accomplishments, relationships, security, and social status might satisfy for a little while, they are transient. Only a relationship with God endures forever.
Life will always be full of twists and turns, disappointments and difficulties, but God’s presence brings a calming influence and a steadfastness that allows the storms to swirl but leaves our core and purpose intact.
In my hopelessness, I made a last-ditch effort and surrendered to the only real hope that any of us have in this world. My circumstances didn’t change, but somehow, I changed. Instead of desperately craving my own family to nurture, I found myself being nurtured by God. It was exciting, meaningful, and fully gratifying. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel hollow. I felt hopeful. I was freed from purposelessness and begin to flourish.
Where are you finding your purpose? What empty places are you trying desperately to fill on your own? God loves you too much to let you settle for momentary pleasures that rust and fade. He wants you to experience everlasting joy. It changes everything. It allows you to be Freed to Flourish.
Dear Lord, I don’t know how to keep trying. I can’t figure it out and I want to believe that you have something meaningful for me. Forgive me for trying to do everything on my own. I surrender to you. Fill me and show me how to live for you. In your name I pray, Amen.
Resources to Help
SONGS
“Lord, I Need You” by Matt Maher
“Living Hope” Phil Wickham